A dear friend and I finally connected last night after missed calls and desperate texts for several days. Texts that said, "got to talk this out." "Could I have gotten this wrong?" So while I baked chicken and tore lettuce and sprinkled cheese, we talked it out.
Oddly enough, her angst was exactly mine. The angst being, if you not so long ago had clear confirmation that a certain direction was the one you were to take, as in "He leadeth me..." in no uncertain terms, then why does that path, the path of obedience, now seem so difficult, so sort of not the right path. Why must you feel the need to question said decision, if, at the time it was made, you had complete assurance that it was a "God-thing" and that it was where He wanted you to go?
So after some serious "talking it out," this soul sister of mine and I decided that life is just like that, that no matter how closely we're trying to walk with the Lord, no matter how clear the Spirit's leading seems, there are times that those beautiful clear waters turn muddy and start running out of control. Someone(don't you hate him) is trying to rob you of God's gift of balance and peace....the life we innately long for.
When Life starts to feel like a trip down the Nantahala (got to be GRITS to get this analagy), we decided it is time to revisit the faithfulness of the One in whom we put our trust. Like David recounted the saving grace provided during the attack of the lion and the attack of the bear before he slew the giant, we need to recount all those places in our life where God has made a way for us, make a sort of a list of spiritual mile markers. We surely have one even when we don't realize it. He is ever faithful despite my clueless lack of acknowledgment.
It is also time, my sister and I concluded, to go back to the drawing board and use the age-old "if the world came to an end tomorrow" measuring stick to clear out life clutter, right wrongs, turn from transgressions(I like this word. It has the needed weightiness.), update our important relationships and get back to a desired homeostasis.
Acknowledging His Amazing Faithfulness on the platform of my Utter Flaky Inability is the only thing that will keep life in perspective.
Save me, O God! For the waters have come up to my neck. Psalm 69:1
Lori,It was such a blessing to discover your blogspot today and God's perfect timing. It is so true that we need to recount all those places in our life where He has made a way! I am struggling today with an answer to prayer that I was not expecting. You know one of those where He answers with a plan you did not see coming and it is totally against the grain. He knows best and I must trust and go with the flow because He HAS made a way for me many a time before. To remember how beautiful those spiritual mile markers are, brimming with glory!
ReplyDeleteI wish I could sit in your kitchen while you are cooking one of those fabulous meals of yours and talk with you! I miss you so much!!
Love,
Bonnie H.
I've been thinking about this post. Randy is teaching our Sunday School class and we are studying Exodus. I'm struck with how God spoke to Moses in a burning bush. Very clear absolute direction. Moses argued and disagreed with God. God agreed to let Aaron help him. God told Moses that he would use Moses to save his people then God intended to kill him because he hadn't circumcised his son. Then God used Moses has he had said he would. Talk about thinking you have clear direction then wondering what you misunderstood. We have to remember that God is always faithful even when we don't see it. Love you. Amy
ReplyDeleteEven for all those great Biblical heroes, it got really confusing sometimes. I am reading the Psalms and David spent most of his time confused and begging God for help. We definitely see darkly as through a glass. One more thing to add to my list of great things about heaven...clarity.
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